The Endless Ride
by HelenScott
Summary: In this story, I imagined some missing scenes that took place between Katniss and Cinna during Catching Fire. KatnissXCinna
1. Chapter 1

_This trip? Girl, wake up! This trip doesn't end when you get back home. You never get off this train!_

Haymitch's words earlier that day hit Katniss like a punch in the stomach. The visit to District 11 had been disastrous. All she had wanted to do was get the tour over with and go back home. _Never get off this train._ This changed everything. Her mind flashed forward to a loveless marriage, possibly children. The "performance" could never end; nothing to look forward to, no surprises, no hope. _Why should I keep doing this?_ She asked herself. _Prim. Do it for Prim._ A soft voice inside her head answered without missing a beat. Her head was swirling.

Now sitting in the luxurious black and silver cocktail car of the train, she was vaguely aware of Haymitch and Peeta discussing how to convince President Snow their little act was real.

"We could get married." Katniss said all of a sudden. She inwardly cringed at how defeated her voice sounded.

Surprised, Peeta and Haymitch fell silent and focused on her. She continued to stare straight ahead as Haymitch scolded her for making jokes.

"I'm serious." She said flatly. "If it's like you said and we're on this train forever it's gonna happen eventually. Why not now?"

Haymitch thought for a second. A smirk slowly formed on his face, no doubt picturing President Snow's reaction.

"It would make a statement, that's for sure," He said after a moment.

Peeta, seeing the indifference on Katniss's face, and looking equally defeated, simply said "Let's do it," and promptly left the room.

Katniss went straight to her room and closed the door. Tomorrow they would likely announce their impending wedding to the world. It was all happening so fast. She saw the rest of her life laid out for her and she wanted none of it.

Finally alone, she stripped off her clothes, angrily throwing them to the floor. She got in the shower and turned it up as hot as she could stand and tried to scrub the day away. Feeling slightly better afterwards, she pulled an oversized v-neck t-shirt over her now-pink skin and wet hair. The shirt was made of soft cotton and came almost to her knees._ I would wear stuff like this all the time if Effie would let me. Just one more thing I have no control over._ Katniss collapsed on the bed. All she wanted was to crawl into it and forget everything that had happened today and just not be conscious for a while.

But sleep wouldn't come. _Of course not, s_he thought bitterly. Troubling thoughts of Peeta, the old man from District 11 and dealing with the Capital the next day kept running through her mind and she couldn't shut it down. After tossing and turning for almost two hours, she threw the covers off and headed to the dining car to make a cup of tea.

She was sitting alone in the dark, watching the moonlit scenery fly by. She wondered what everyone was doing in District 12._ Probably sleeping like I should be._ She had just begun pondering adding a bit of alcohol to her beverage when she heard someone else come in. The person turned on a small light, just enough to see where he was going. Katniss let out the breath she didn't realize she was holding when she saw it was Cinna. She was relieved as she didn't think she could handle dealing with anyone else. He walked over and sat down near her. He wondered how she felt about the engagement. She had never seemed too over-the-moon about Peeta, but Haymitch did mention it was her idea.

"Hey," She said and managed a small smile. They sat in silence for a moment before he spoke.

"Dare I say congratulations?" He asked cautiously.

"Don't you dare," She answered miserably. She felt like throwing one of the expensive designer pillows at his head.

"Oh...well then let me start over," He said and took her hand in his. "My sincerest condolences."

That got a laugh from Katniss but her smile soon faded. Cinna gave her a concerned look. It wasn't fair. First the Games and now this. Katniss was staring at the floor.

"At least you'll have the most divine wedding dress in the universe," He said gently.

She tried to smile but her mouth just quivered and tears fell from her eyes.

"It's like my life isn't mine anymore! I mean really! What was the point of surviving the Games if I have to live like this," She said, getting more worked up.

It was too much to handle. Putting on an act 24/7 was incredibly draining. This was the first authentic conversation she'd had in a long time. Cinna gave her hand a squeeze.

"I'd rather be dead."

"Don't ever say that." Cinna said, his tone serious, almost angry.

"Why not?" She cried, not caring if anyone else heard. "It's true!"

She moved closer to the window. In a flash of impulse she pushed it open and jumped up onto the ledge.

"Katniss!" Cinna grabbed for her arm, but missed.

"I should end it all right here, right now- on _my_ terms, not theirs!"

"Katniss- just stop for a second and think- you know you can't do that!" Cinna said firmly. He held his hand out to her. Katniss didn't take it.

"Give me one good reason!" She yelled, furious. Angry tears burned her eyes. Who was he to tell her what she could and couldn't do! She had more than enough reasons to leap from this train going 200 mph.

"I'll give you two." He said, taking a step towards her. "Your sister Prim," He said first.

She shrugged and gave Cinna a blank look.

"I can never be what Snow wants me to be," She said, shaking her head. "I'll just end up getting her killed."

"And if you just give up and die- you think _that_ won't kill her?" He said.

Cinna's words were like a slap in the face. Katniss imagined Prim being told she had killed herself and she knew he was right. He was always right. But that didn't make it any easier. There were no good choices here. She felt incredibly foolish all of a sudden.

Just then, Katniss felt herself pulled forcefully from the window ledge and thrown to the carriage floor. Cinna had grabbed her when she wasn't paying attention. She blindly fought her captor and got in one good punch but soon found her hands held to the floor. She instinctively kept kicking and thrashing around trying to get free, in her mind fighting against the Capital and everything she had been forced into. She had never been so angry. She heard a distant voice calling her name over and over- a voice that sounded like Cinna's. She was confused and tried to focus on it. As she did this, the voice got closer. Finally, she came back to reality and found herself on the floor with Cinna putting all of his weight on top of her. She stopped struggling and he saw the recognition in her eyes.

"If you calm down, I'll let you go," He said evenly.

Katniss nodded, still breathing heavily. Cinna released her hands and rose to a kneeling position. Katniss sat up slowly, feeling slightly dizzy. She began gingerly rubbing her wrists.

"You're stronger than you look," She said, feeling somewhere between impressed and embarrassed.

"So are you," He said, wincing as he touched the spot under his left eye where her punch had landed. It was just starting to bruise.

"Oh shit did I do that?" She blurted. "Don't move."

Katniss jumped up and quickly grabbed a cloth and some ice sat down next to Cinna. She gently placed it on the bruised area and held it there.

"Sorry," She said sheepishly and looked at the floor. "I don't know how you put up with me."

"Neither do I," He said. "I must be crazy out of my mind."

"Come on- you know you love me," She joked but then, for some reason, felt awkward after saying it.

Cinna just sighed and brushed a stray lock of tousled hair out of her face.

"My hair's always a mess," She said and looked away, hoping he didn't see her blush.

"Hey," He said. "I want you to promise me something."

"Anything."

"No more talk about dying. Ever. Ok?"

"I promise," Katniss said and she meant it.

Satisfied, Cinna nodded. They sat in silence for a moment. Cinna drew his knees up to his chest and leaned back against the velvet couch. Katniss stared at her nails. _I wish I hadn't bitten them so much. They'll have to be re-done. _Remembering something, she turned back to Cinna.

"Hey Cinna," She asked, the wind from the still-open window whistling in the background.

"Yes, Katniss?"

"You said you had two good reasons for me not to jump- what's the second one?" She asked, her inquisitive eyes locking with his. He had beautiful eyes- green with flecks of gold. Cinna held her gaze.

"Me," He said without hesitation.


	2. Chapter 2

**6 weeks later...**

Peeta stood on the tribute stage, the last of the 24 to be interviewed.

"Katniss and I have been luckier than most. I wouldn't have any regrets at all if it weren't…uh…" Peeta broke off.

"If it weren't for what?" Ceasar pushed him to finish. The crowd was silent.

"If it weren't for the baby," He said finally.

There were many audible gasps in the audience.

Cinna raised his eyebrows at the announcement. Leave it to Peeta to throw another wrench in the Capital's well-oiled gears. _Clever ploy. Very clever. _ A smile ghosted on his lips. And then he saw Katniss.

Katniss had never looked more shocked. All the color drained from her face and her gray eyes went wide. _How? How did he know? _This was madness! She felt lightheaded but then remembered where she was and how many people were watching. She quickly put her mask back on but couldn't stop a single tear from rolling down her cheek. She searched the crowd and locked eyes with Cinna, silently trying to convey what he had just realized. She really was pregnant and Cinna was the father.

After a few seconds someone shouted 'Call off the games!' More people followed the lead and soon the stadium was chanting "Call off the games! Call off the games!"

Haymitch clapped heartily and whistled as a Peeta climbed the stairs to stand next to Katniss. The look on his face said _Take that! _ He glanced at Katniss, who wouldn't meet his eyes and looked positively ill. The tributes all held hands to show solidarity and then they were whisked offstage as the lights went out. The whole thing was a blur to Katniss. All she could think was that she needed to find Cinna. And possibly throw up.

Peeta was suddenly at her side.

"Sorry I didn't warn you first but I needed you to look surprised. Haymitch didn't even know this time. You did amazing!"

Katniss put her hand over her mouth as she felt her stomach churn. Peeta's face fell as he registered her reaction.

"Is the thought of being pregnant with my child really that disgusting to you?" He asked softly.

But Katniss was already running in the other direction. She ducked into an elevator and slammed her hand on the 12 button.

A few minutes later Katniss was draped over the toilet in her room, crying softly. She heard the sound of a door open and close. She flushed the toilet and quickly splashed some water on her face and rinsed her mouth out. She opened the bathroom door. Cinna stood quietly across the room.

"Hi Cinna," She said softly, her voice raspy.

"Hi Katniss," He replied.

As Katniss stared into his eyes, her mind flashed forward showing quick glimpses of what could be; a beautiful toddler with her dark hair and his green eyes, the three of them holding hands as they strolled in the woods, her on one side, Cinna on the other, together as a family, happy, carefree. The way it was meant to be.

She came back to the present to see Cinna still staring at her, his eyes full of love and concern. She was so completely happy and yet terrified all at the same time. Her lip was quivering and tears threatened to spill from her eyes as she fought to keep her emotions in check. And then asked herself _what for?_

She ran the few steps that separated them and jumped into Cinna's waiting arms, almost knocking him over. She clung to him, sobbing, as all the emotions of the last month came pouring out. He held her patiently, stroking her hair and whispering to her that everything would be ok. After a few minutes, she gently pulled free and looked up at him.

"We're gonna have a baby," She said with the most brilliant smile.

"I know." He said, and smiled right back.


End file.
